Monday, September 24, 2012

10th Anniversary

Friday is my 10th wedding anniversary! Insane that I've been married for 10 years.  How am I old enough to be married for 10 years? Crazy.

So...what are our big 10th anniversary plans?  Well, I will be flying across the country, leaving Brian with the kids for the weekend.  My best friend, Karen, is having a party to celebrate her marriage, baby, and the long awaited completion of her PhD. She has been a busy girl.

It is funny celebrating Karen's amazing year on our anniversary.  The 3 of us go way back.

At Karen's house before a school dance. I think this was 1992.

I can't believe I'm even sharing this picture.  It was 20 years ago.  I'm the one on the left with the RIDICULOUS hair.  Pretty cool we are all still together.  I'm sad that Brian won't be at the party.  It would be great for the 3 of us to celebrate together.  We have all done an awful lot since this picture was taken.  We have been separated by many miles and have gone years without talking. But when we got back together, it was like no time had past.  This is true for me and Karen as well as me and Brian.  They are two of the most important people in my life.  

Brian's 37th birthday party.

Here are some wedding pictures, because I got caught up looking at them this afternoon.

It was an amazing day. It has been an even more amazing 10 years.  

Friday, September 21, 2012

One Step Closer

I've been struggling with respiratory issues for about 6 weeks now. It is getting old.  This morning I went to NW Asthma and Allergy to get some answers. Pnut went with me because she didn't have school today.  I knew this would be a long appointment so I was prepared.  I downloaded all kinds of stuff on the iPad.  Thank goodness I did, because the appointment was longer than I expected.

Once I got there the nurse made me breathe into a tube.  My breathing was in the normal range. I took this as a good sign since the last two doctors I had seen kept talking about asthma.  Next, I met with an intern (or maybe a Fellow) either way, he asked me a billion questions.  I did have to confess to smoking (many moons ago) while Pnut was in the room.  Thankfully she was watching Scooby Doo and I don't think she heard.  I sure hope not.

Next I was tested for allergies.

This caused a lot of coughing and a runny nose, but no hives.  So the doctor decided to do some more testing.  Something called inter-dermal testing. They shot the stuff into my arm.  This was a little unpleasant, but not bad.

It turns out I'm a little allergic to cats, dogs and dust mites.  The doctor didn't think my allergies were bad enough to be causing my problems.  So.....we moved on to a CT Scan.  These guys were not messing around.  I have the CT Scan and the nice lady who did it took some time to show the pictures to Pnut and explain what was what.  She loved it.  

When the doctor came back he explained that I have a sinus infection and this was the cause of my breathing problems.  I was SUPER thankful to be finished with all the asthma talk.  A sinus infection seems much more manageable.  

I'm on another 14 days of antibiotics plus another round of steroids.  I had to stop the last round of steroids because the side effects were so bad.  I'm really not looking forward to taking it again.  At least it's only 4 days.  I was told I could start running again after I finish the steroids.  I REALLY hope this works.  I'm anxious to get back out there.  I feel like I'm one step closer.  I hope I'm one step closer.

Wednesday, September 19, 2012

Good Enough

I'm about at the end of my rope.  I have somehow become Room Mom for Little Dude's class.  I'm doing volunteer training for Pnuts school tomorrow so I can work in her classroom.   Speaking of Pnut's school, it's a 30 min drive, each way.  This is a ridiculous amount of driving.  We also have swimming, gymnastics and a crazy amount of birthday parties.   I should say that all of this is exactly what I've always wanted. Not the drive to Pnut's school, but everything else.  The whole reason I stopped working was so I could do these things.   So why is it so difficult?

I once read a parenting book that talked about "good enough" parenting.  I thought the idea of this was silly.  Is being "good enough" really enough?  Shouldn't we strive for a little more than good enough?  I'm trying, but it might be killing me.

I'm trying to eat better and trying to get my family to eat better.  This means a lot of cooking from scratch and a lot of listening to people complain about what I feed them.  I end up getting frustrated because I spend so much time and energy (and money) making food that's good for them and they don't eat it.  I keep telling myself if that's all they get, they will eat it.  But I end up caving and buying crap.  I guess sometimes crap has to be good enough.

Other than the school stuff, I'm trying to figure out Pnut's sinus issues and my own allergy/sinus/asthma stuff.  I'm so tired of dealing with it.   I'm taking Pnut to a nutritionist to see if she might be allergic to something.  We are going on  year 3 of trying to find answers.  I'm so sick of it.  I hate that she lives in a constant state of uncomfortableness.  I hate that no one has figured out what is causing it.  No one is really even looking for the cause, they are just looking for a fix.  As much as I don't want to do anymore, I feel that this is not a time when "good enough" is enough.

As far as my stuff goes, I have an appointment with an asthma/allergy specialist on Friday.  I'm hoping they can help me out and I can get back to training.  I tried to run a few days ago.  I made it a mile before I started coughing up gross stuff.  For the rest of the day and the next couple days I was coughing and wheezing.

I haven't consistently trained since March.  It sucks but there is nothing I can do about it.  I'm hoping I'll have some answers Friday.

So, bottom line...I can only do so much.  I can't be great at everything, it is too hard.  Sometimes I just have to be good enough.

Thursday, September 13, 2012

Summer, what happened?

I had such grand plans for this summer.  Our first summer, as a family, in the Pacific Northwest.  In case you've never been, summer in Seattle is amazing.  Short, but amazing.  Now, here it is, September 13th and I'm looking back at a less than amazing summer.  Sure, we had some fabulous times, but it was nothing like what i was hoping for.

First of, my race season was a bust.  I struggled through the Rock n Roll half.  I couldn't do Lake Steven's 70.3.  The inaugural Edmonds Half is this weekend and I can't run it.  It has been a summer plagued by injury and illness.  These things happen.  You deal (and complain) and move on.

I did have some good races.  The Issaquah Sprint and the Danskin were fun and I did better than expected in both.

There is still a chance I can do the Snohomish River Run at the end of October.  Not a great chance, but a chance.

Second, the family aspect of summer.  The kids are home from school, the sun is out, days are longer, sounds perfect.  Not so much.  Pnut and I had a rough summer.  We argued and cried and screamed.  It was sad.  It still is sad, but we are working on it.

We did have some great summer time fun.  We had trips to Leavenworth, days at the beach, farmer's markets, visits from friends and family, cook outs, and tons of festivals.
Pool at Leavenworth

Orcas Island
Tide pooling

More than anything, I feel bad that I didn't take full advantage of it.  It is still nice out, but the days are getting shorter, the kids are back in school and our schedules are packed.

All I can do now is move on and enjoy all fall has to offer.

I am so close to being well again.  Today is my last day of this ridiculous assortment of medicine.

I am hopeful my lungs will let me run soon.  I am confident I will get a few bike rides in before the rain comes.  I am optimistic Pnut and I will work through whatever is going on.  How could we not?

She isn't missing part of her head :)
Now that I've written this, I feel like I should cross out the first paragraph.  It wasn't a perfect summer, we had our ups and downs, but it was pretty darn good.